My Fat Habits

Okay so I thought it'd be good to write about why I'm fat. Why am I fat? (Fat's an ugly word. Almost anytime someone uses it, it's almost always followed by, 'you're not fat!' And maybe I'm not "fat" according to some definitions, but according to the BMI thing I am OBESE. That's an even uglier word if ya ask me...) Back to the topic here. I have some bad habits. I want to recognize them, and destroy them.

For starters, I am a stress eater. HUGE stress eater. If I'm even feeling slightly anxious I am looking for something to put in my mouth. Specifically something sweet.

I also can not walk past food and leave it alone. I will pick at it and eat it. I am still the little kid with my finger in the frosting of the cake. Sometimes the food doesn't even have to be visible. I still find it hard to walk through my mother's kitchen without pulling something from the cupboard.

Along these same lines I always finish everything on my plate. I try to leave a few bites, since that's advice I've been given. And it's not like I have a problem with waste. I have a problem with never feeling full. I can honestly out eat almost everyone I know. I literally have to force myself to stop eating. The only time I ever feel full is when I'm pregnant. Otherwise, I'm like a bottomless pit.

Okay healthy things I do naturally, or sometimes force myself to do. I always take the stairs. I park far away. I play with my kids. I drink a lot of water. I never (very rarely) drink soda. It's a rare treat to get a candy bar or anything like that. We eat a lot of lean meats, whole wheat, fruits, and vegetables. By all that I SHOULD be skinny, right??? Guess I have to kick those fat habits.

Also, I bake like the BEST chocolate chip cookies ever. When I make them, I lose all self control, am grateful for my bottomless stomach and I devour a dozen the first day I make them. So yeahh taking a little break from making those for a while. But every once and a while... I just have to make them. When all the forces in the world align and I can hear the chocolate chips beckoning me from their drawer. I hear it when I see a whole stick of butter still perfectly wrapped in it's paper. When I come across a brand new bag of soft brown sugar. When I pull out the gallon of milk and they have a flippin' ad for cookies on the back! It's all a conspiracy to make me fat, I know it.